Loose Ends

  • Dustin Keller

The Tight End positions has been evolving over the last few seasons. A little over a decade ago, basketball player turned TE, Tony Gonzalez caught 93 balls for 1203 yards and 9 TDs. Those were (and still are) ridiculous numbers for a TE. It didn’t take long for the copycat league to take action.

Players like Antonio Gates, Jimmy Graham, Rob Gronkowski, and Vernon Davis have revolutionized the way the TE position is played. The Patriots even took it a step farther by drafting 2 athletic TEs to create mismatches. Some teams are trendsetters… some teams are completely clueless.

The Miami Dolphins… obviously… fall into the latter category. During the regime changes of 2008, Miami drafted an OT and traded for a familiar face in Anthony Fasano and signed Sean Ryan, while the Falcons drafted a QB and signed the TE that started it all… Gonzalez. I give Jeff Ireland credit… he must know the importance of the TE position… he’s always bringing in acorns.

Here is a list of nuts brought in by Jeff Ireland: Sean Ryan, Anthony Fasano, John Nalbone, Joey Haynos, Charles Clay, Dedrick Epps, Mickey Shuler, Will Yeatman, Michael Egnew, Kyle Miller, and Dion Sims. That’s a lot of nuts and one pussy. No offense to Joey and Mickey, but what a dumpster fire that is. Maybe that’s why Dolphins fans were so smitten with Dustin Keller.

Dustin Keller… oft injured and playing with Butt Fumbler… decided to take a one-year deal to prove his worth in sunny Miami. All signs pointed to Dustin having a good (if not great) year as Tannehill’s security blanket. But… there’s always a but… Dustin’s leg was torn to shreds the other night leaving the Dolphins with loose ends… not tight ends. So with the regular season inching closer… the Dolphins are left scratching their asses looking for nuts.

This is just further proof that Jeff Ireland has no business in the NFL. Jeff has drafted a TE in each of the last three drafts. So he must know the importance of the position… he obviously just can’t scout worth a damn. Here is a list of young TEs (all taken in the last 3 seasons… when it was a position of need) Kyle Rudolph, Jordan Cameron, Coby Fleener, Dwayne Allen, Tyler Eifert, Zach Ertz, Gavin Escobar, and Travis Kelce just to name a few.

The worst part… if Charles Clay was the player Ireland thought he’d be… there would have been no reason to draft Egnew or Sims. As I said on twitter… those two picks could have landed the Dolphins T.Y. Hilton and Barrett Jones. You can add 2013 TEs to the ever-growing list of Ireland failures. But have faith Gingerites… there’s still a chance he can redeem himself by signing Randy McMichael. #OFY

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